Going mobile, but don't even think of using it

By Jason Goldstein — Aug. 30, 2010

Some of you may have heard that Vimeo now supports mobile devices (iProducts). We've implemented the feature, but we don't think you should ever use it.

First I need to go on a tangent

Hi, my name is Jason and I am a Netflix addict.

Years ago, I went with Randy on a run to Hollywood Video (RIP). For those who never experienced 17-year-old Randy's approach to movie rentals, it was a serious, methodical endeavor that required all parties involved to scan the entire inventory before even considering making a selection.

For movie junkies everywhere, Netflix broke the habit. And when it was done hooking everyone on the convenience of movies by mail, it one-upped itself with streaming.

Nolan's Dream (Within a Dream, Within a Dream)

If you've seen Inception, you know Chris Nolan's mind-fuck of a movie is wall-to-wall art direction. You know it's layered with complex sound production and the extra bass that only Nolan can pull off. Whether he's presenting a psychological heist or a gritty deep-throated Batman, it's an immersive experience.

You can't get that experience on a tiny screen with small speakers.

I don't think this is exclusive to movies with lots of special effects. Last night, I (finally) watched Frost/Nixon, where the plot consists of two guys sitting in chairs. But the action -- the story -- takes place in the subtle tremors of their voices, in the bits of expression that slip through their faces.

Again, if you're not emerged in the film, you're not getting the full effect.

iPad is a revolution? Eh, not for movies

I have yet to see a digital platform that can top Netflix streaming. From where I'm sitting (a couch, as it happens) it's close enough to DVD-quality, and it's consistent enough to make me forget I'm watching a digital stream (as oppposed to Hulu and it's erratic buffering).

I figured Netflix streaming for iPad should be pretty good, so I plugged in a pair of headphones and picked a movie.

I've watched plenty of movies on my laptop, and that's fine. But something about watching a movie on a device you hold in your hands just doesn't work. It seems like a strange problem, since we read by holding things in our hands, but reading is an active process - you push the pace yourself, you turn pages. Movies... you're supposed to shut up and put the remote down lest you become one of "those people."

But most importantly, I was distracted, constantly. I couldn't sink into it.

Perhaps I'm the problem. Perhaps I've gotten too used to Blu-Ray and silver screens to hold a movie in the palm of my hand. But perhaps not. Perhaps the way we watch movies, the immersive experience, requires the screen to be sitting still in front of us. After all, why sit on the edge of your seat when the scene will lean back with you?

It's all in the cast

Mobile YouTube is fine. Mobile news makes sense. But mobile movies... well, the thing is, we're lucky to have an incredible cast. The people who play our core characters are exceptional, and if you want to see their full performances, please, find a screen that let's you see every subtle twitch.

Personally, I'm relegating mobile film to gimmick-land, where it can live with 3D movies (people are catching on) and Sharp's Quattron (which can produce colors that the cameras used to make movies don't actually record).

Then again, I'm usually a little outspoken.